A Wild Winter’s Day
The sharp and violent jerk of the vehicle jostled Harry awake, his mind clouded with confusion. He sat upright and took in his surroundings, seeing nothing but the snow blowing relentlessly against the windshield and the stony expressions from the passengers as they focused on the road ahead. Guilt settled in his chest at falling asleep while his security team weathered the blizzard conditions, knowing how they wouldn’t be in this predicament if it weren’t for him. The fleeting resentment of being who he was passed through his mind, as it often did before he shook himself more awake and alert, letting old feelings go.
He didn’t know how long he had napped, unable to remember ever closing his eyes for more than a second. He had been running on the high emotions that were taking him on a rollercoaster ride for the past 30 hours or so, never taking a moment to rest his eyes until his body shut down on it’s own accord, desperate to be in repose.
“We’re about twenty minutes away, Sir.”
Harry met Dave’s all knowing eyes through the rear view mirror and nodded his thanks.
Twenty minutes.
It should have created some sort of solace, being that close to her. It should have calmed the storm in his head, in his heart. But it didn’t. Twenty minutes just wasn’t soon enough. Not after being away from her warmth for so long—too long.
And certainly not when she needed him.
Harry threw his head back on the headrest and sighed out loud, rubbing his blurred eyes from the lack of a good night’s sleep. It had been a long journey, one of many frustrations and setbacks that had caused his mood to shift drastically from one minute to the next. He was temperamental—had always been when under extreme stress—but he had never taken his anger out on the innocent individuals that crossed his path like he had been doing lately. He snapped at his security team, practically attacked Maggie by shouting expletives through the phone while he settled in his seat on the plane, and just about shattered his mobile into millions of pieces at the failed attempts to reach Anna.
It had been an emotional couple weeks, ever since their fallout with the pregnancy scare, and it was weighing him down. After he had walked out on her, he turned to the poison he had grown dependent on during low points of his life. Alcohol was his best mate, helping him drown his sorrows. He had shamelessly wept alone in his flat at night, disparity controlling his actions. He had cursed, broken a few valuables, caused more damage to his liver than he cared to admit, all the while dwelling over the possibility of having to come to terms with never achieving what he wanted the most in life: a happy, successful union…with her.
But his anger that was deep in his chest towards her subsided after one phone call. It was all it took to change everything.
Harry’s chest began to burn as he brought himself back to that moment when he heard the unmistakable wavering of Lucille’s voice, and the emotions he had endured came flooding back. He hadn’t known how she got his number, one of her son’s or maybe Annalisa herself, but it hadn’t crossed his mind… he hadn’t given it one single thought. Because all he could think about was how sorry he was. How it hurt him so to hear her mother bravely keep her tears at bay, struggling as she briefed him on the events that had transpired back in Boston. How he wished he could reach through the phone and hug her tight, offer up his sincere condolences and comfort her.
Looking back, he wouldn’t remember the stumble he took as his legs almost gave out when he heard Lucille’s broken words, he wouldn’t be able to recall the sting of unshed tears in his eyes as she spoke softly to him, like a kind soul that had been ripped apart. But the wind being knocked out of him, the pain crushing his pipes.. that was something he would never forget.
Harry had experienced the same shock he felt then on the phone with her before, being able to relate to shattering loss. He had spent years reliving it, retracing everything he had done the day before, the night of.. trying to make sense of how a normal day could go completely wrong. For years, he couldn’t help but feel he had done something wrong. Maybe he didn’t try hard enough, didn’t behave well enough.. Didn’t do something enough to prevent such a cruel punishment.
Because that’s what it felt like at times. Punishment.
And then a vision of the woman he loved with his entire soul came to mind and his heart broke at her having to bear the same suffering he had.
Harry’s chest tightened and his breaths came out in harsh pants, scrambling to keep himself in check, to keep an ounce of control as he envisioned the grief that he knew was hardening her usual soft features. He could feel the pain radiate from her, even being miles and miles away. The hurt—the abandonment—that came along with losing a parent.. he felt all of it.
And he knew what he had to do.
He tried to call her first, only to be disappointed by the immediate sounds of her voicemail picking up, meaning she had powered off her phone to dismiss any calls. Then he called his father, asking for assistance in arranging a private jet to fly over to the States. Having to contact his father and ask for help wasn’t something he was particularly fond of, his independent and self sufficiency along with his pride being the main reasoning. He was certainly capable of formulating a course of action on his own with little notice, spending endless amount of hours training for it and having the experience during his two tours on foreign lands.
He knew what he would have done without his father. First: Contact his security team and hold an urgent meeting with the appropriate personnel to go over the options on flying commercial. Next: Notify the office that he would be taking conference calls and working through email only for awhile due to private matters. Third: Pack his belongings for an indefinite stay. And finally: Be with her.
It was simple, really. Almost a little too simple. But nothing in his life would ever go as smoothly as it should. So when Lucille had voiced her concern on the fate of his arrival due to Logan International Airport cancelling the majority of its scheduled flights from the impending blizzard, all of the simplicity was shot to hell and he had to push his pride to the side.
When he reluctantly spoke to his father, Charles had been upfront with his doubts of allowing such dangerous travels. They had argued back and forth, both coming across with strong arguments, but Harry would not back down like he had so many times previously on their debates. Not when it came to this.
So he used the one weakness he knew his father had. Camilla.
And it had worked like a charm.
Not a half hour went by before Charles phoned Harry back to give him the instructions of when and where to get on the private jet he had arranged. Harry had felt the instant relief on hearing the jet was already being prepped for the journey, wanting to get there as quickly as possible. But there was only one setback. The only place he would be able to land safely would be in North Carolina. Thirteen hours away from Boston by car. On a clear, dry day.
It had been the longest troubled journey of his life. But as much as he hated the long wait to finally hold her in his arms and whisper that it was going to be okay, he was grateful for duration it took to reach the city. It allowed him the time he needed to think, to clear his head on what had transpired the last time he saw her.
It made him realize that as much as he wanted a family, as much as he wanted a bunch of little feet pounding against the floorboards of Kensington Palace, giggles and screeching filling his heart as he chased them around, he was willing to let that go if it meant he could be with her. It pained him to let that dream go, it truly did. But nothing pained him more than the thought of waking up in the morning without her at his side, cuddled up close to him. If she didn’t want children, if she wasn’t able to let that fear go, he would take what she was able to give him. Her heart. And that would be good enough for him.
He was willing to compromise, like an adult.
“Sir, I believe we’ve arrived.”
He couldn’t tell who announced it, too deep and lost in his own thoughts. But once the words registered, the exhaustion he had felt just moments ago evaporated as the blood pumped through his veins and his heart hammered in his chest. He had finally arrived after a long struggle. He was here, at her family home, about to see her.
Harry hurriedly unbuckled the seat belt and zipped up his coat that he had undone after feeling overwhelmed with the cranked up heat, excitement and nerves presently in the pit of his stomach. It tug at his belly as he thought of what her reception would be, especially after he had been the one to walk out on her weeks ago.
Would she be angry with him? Would she push him away like she had a habit of doing? Or would she be too relieved to see him, like he was to see her, that whatever happened to them previously, it didn’t matter anymore.
The door swung open in a force too grand that he wasn’t entirely sure it didn’t cause any damage, but he didn’t pay any mind to that. He jumped out of the car and fought against the gush of winds, approaching the front door and noting the snow covered wreath that hung there, hanging on through the storm. He tried to take a breath but the storm blowing around him made that nearly impossible. But even as the forceful winds denied him a full deep inhale, nothing took his breath away than the sight that was before him seconds after he had reached the door.
There she was, standing there with puffy red eyes, looking pensively at him. He was frozen, unsure on how to proceed, wanting nothing more than to take her in his arms and kiss the hurt away.
“Hi,” he blurted with a small smile.
And then her lips curved, weakening his knees and speeding up the steady thump in his chest just before she made a dash for him. Harry caught her and held her close instantly, Anna clinging tightly to him.
“Harry,” she croaked, tears coating her voice as they embraced each other—as if it had been years since the last time. “Harry..”
“Oh, baby,” Harry breathed out, tears stinging his eyes.
It didn’t take long before Anna let herself crumble, feeling secure there in his embrace to let the despair show, leaning on him for support. That’s what she had needed all along. Harry.
“My daddy’s gone, Harry,” she cried into his shoulder. “He’s gone.“ He stroked her back soothingly while he kept one arm firmly around her waist, lifting her up higher, desperate to get her as close to him as he could, burying his nose in her frosted hair.
“I’m so sorry, love.”
The few teardrops slipped from his eyes when he felt her hot tears on his skin, sliding down his cheeks and disappearing somewhere in her dark locks.
“He left.. Oh god, he really left,” she sobbed, her voice muffled as she cried in the crook of his neck. “My daddy.. my daddy..”
And Harry let her cry, let her voice the thoughts she had kept hostage inside of her ever since that day her father passed, putting on a brave face for everyone, her mother especially. But she couldn’t be strong anymore, she couldn’t keep the thoughts trapped any longer as they poured out of her and onto his neck.
They spent the majority of the night in a tight embrace as the storm continued on, the howls outside droning out her cries as they laid together on the sofa in the living room before they both drifted off, exhaustion taking over.
***
When morning came, the snow was still steadily coming down but the wild winds had tapered off. It was just a temporary relief before another storm would hit and the damaging winds would return for the remainder of the day and into the night.
Harry woke to the sound of children laughing outside, joyful screams as they were most likely partaking in snowball fights before having to be forced indoors until the next day. Neighbors were enjoying the pretty white that covered the landscape, conversing happily at such an early hour, shoveling to make room for more. But instead of a boisterous celebration sounding throughout the house he had fought to get to, everything was eerily still, the only sound coming from the persistent grandfather clock ticking every second.
The mess of curls that was on his chest stirred and Harry felt Anna’s sharp inhale as he tightened his hold on her. Anna turned her head and met his still swollen eyes with her chin on his chest, smiling at the gentle sleepy smile he offered her.
“Hey,” he said, groggily.
“Hi,” Anna responded, shifting slightly to get into a more comfortable position, Harry’s hold never letting up as he assisted her. “You’re really here.“
“I am,” he confirmed, subconsciously tickling the patch of skin that was revealed from her shirt riding up as she twisted to lay half on him and the other half on the sofa.
“I thought it was a dream.” A chuckle passed her lips as she rolled her eyes upward. “That sounds so lame.“
“No,” Harry’s lips curved wider as he looked down at her. “That’s not lame at all. In fact, I’m still having trouble believing it myself.“
Awkwardness settled between them, both unsure of where they stood and where to go from here. All Anna knew was that Harry was here, he had come to her in her time of grieving. That had to count for something, right?
But Harry hadn’t kissed her like he always did in the morning, hadn’t made any notion to do so since he arrived. Sure, he kept his hands on her back or at her waist, but she was worried that was just his way of being polite, of offering his condolences.
What she didn’t know was that Harry’s lips were itching to press on hers, her mouth tempting him as she bit her lower lip in thought, looking so desirable without even trying. But that’s how Harry always remembered her being: naturally sexy. He wanted to grab her hips and take her mouth, his tongue missing her exotic yet familiar taste.
He longed to feel her body writhe underneath him as she eagerly met every single one of his deep thrusts. Or the heavenly sight of her languidly moving above him with her head carelessly thrown back as she brought both of them to peak in the most mind boggling release he could recall. He wanted to lay comfortably under the sheets with her in the afterglow, sharing small innocent touches, breathing in unison before one of them would open up with a lighthearted joke.
He wanted to spend every waking moment with her, laughing or crying or just laying in silence. He wanted all of it. The good, the bad, the normalcy in between.
He missed the at ease feeling of being with her, the completeness he felt staring into her mesmerizing eyes…the love that glowed around them.
He missed them.
But as much as he wanted her back—wanted them back—he held back, putting his concern of her well being first, throwing the ball in her court.
“How are you?” Harry asked, grimacing inwardly at how cliche it came out. But Anna didn’t show any annoyance towards it, kindly smiling at him.
“Okay,” she whispered, eyes darting between his ocean blue eyes—the only pair of eyes that could look deeply into her soul.
He nodded slightly, recognizing the automatic response that he was certain she had been reciting for days now.
“How are you, really?”
Anna was stunned silence, appreciating how Harry could always see right through her facade. It was mentally exhausting trying to keep it together, acting okay in front of everybody, tip toeing around her own emotions so she wouldn’t break. But Harry… he gave her a safe place that allowed her to come out of her shell, encouraging her to voice her true emotions, whether it was good or bad.
“I-” she stuttered, tears that she thought were all cried out welling in her tired eyes again.
Harry felt his stomach tighten at her face contorting into one of emotional turmoil. Bringing his hand up to cup her cheek, he wiped off the fallen tears, his eyes softening when she leaned into his touch.
“You don’t have to put up a front with me, you know. It’s okay to say you’re not okay, peaches. It’s only me here.”
A watery smile painted on her mouth, a small giggle escaping past her lips as her eyes slid shut.
“What?” Harry asked lightly, unable to keep a smile off of his face at the sight of hers.
“You called me peaches,” she said in the lowest tone he had ever heard her speak in. “I missed that.“
“I missed you,” he blurted without a second’s hesitation.
“I missed you, too, Harry. God, I… I really fucking missed you.”
Anna leaned her head on his, breathing his short breaths, eyes shut as they relished in the moment of being together again. Harry’s hand glided on her porcelain skin, sliding up to tangle in her hair, bringing her even closer to him.
“I’m okay with you here.”
Anna’s heart was racing and she was sure Harry could feel it as it vibrated against his own chest. She thought she had lost him, broken them beyond repair. She never thought she would feel the love of his gentle touch again, or his body heat warming her insides. And now that he was here, touching her and allowing her to be close to him again, she didn’t want to stop there. She never wanted to stop. She needed him.
Desire was radiating off of both of them and the steady drumming of her heart matched the pounding of his as they laid there, so close to giving in to each other.
“Harry..” She whimpered when he angled his head and bumped her nose with his, rubbing them together affectionately.
“Yeah?” He murmured, his breath tickling her hungry lips.
“Please..”
Harry swallowed at her plea, knowing what she was asking him for. Nerves tightened his stomach muscles and a tremble began in his hands. He wanted to give her everything and anything she wanted. Wanted to make her feel really okay and alive again. And shit, he would make that happen. They would start anew, stronger than ever, that he was sure of.
“What do you need, love?”
“You,” she breathed out quickly.
“You have me, baby. I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere. I love you so much.”
A cry was muffled by his mouth as he captured hers in a hard kiss, one that was full of devotion and promise. At the first contact, Anna’s hands tightened around the collar of his shirt, pulling him closer as their lips met again and again in feverish kisses, bruising with the intensity.
A vibrating sound rumbled deep in his chest when her tongue poked at his lips, and he willingly opened up to her, meeting her sweet tongue with his, an electric current passing through them. Between his moan and the intoxicating taste of him again as he sucked on her tongue, a delicious tingle shot down her spine, causing Anna to groan into his mouth, wetness pooling between her thighs.
“Harry..” His hand responded by groping her bottom, bringing her flush against him while his tongue repeatedly lapped at hers.
“Whoa! Holy shit!”
They tore their mouths apart abruptly in loud gasps, looking towards the voice that came from the staircase, their breaths coming out in harsh pants and their eyes wide.
“Fuck.”
Upon seeing Kathie’s amused expression and Luke’s shocked one with his mouth hanging open, they scrambled to sit upright and apart like two love struck teenagers who had been caught sucking face.
“Shit,” Anna cursed, straightening her wrinkled shirt while Harry cleared his throat and rubbed the crown of his head, their cheeks blazing in embarrassment and hearts fighting to return to a normal pace.
“Didn’t expect to see that before breakfast.” Kathie joked.
“Anna, aren’t you a bit old to be making out on the family sofa?” Came Luke’s dry comment.
“Shut up.” Anna scoffed and elbowed Harry when he snickered, the chemistry still very strong between them as they came down from the high.
“Harry,” Kathie laughed, eyes dancing with amusement. “Nice to see you again… Seems like we keep meeting unexpectedly.“
“Yeah,” he chortled, threading his fingers through his mussed hair. “Sorry about that.“
“Oh, no! Please don’t apolo-”
“What’s going on down here?”
Anna groaned at the sound of her mother’s curiosity, the blush on her cheeks deepening.
“Oh, hello.” There was no mistaking the pleasant sound in Lucille’s voice when she came into view and Anna instantly knew who had called Harry by the broad smile on her mother’s face. She mentally set a reminder to thank her for meddling later, no matter how many times she had told her not to.
“Mrs. Caro,” Harry greeted the tiny woman as he stood and approached her, offering her a big and warm hug, something he had wanted to do ever since their brief conversation.
“Hello, sweetheart,” she said, reaching around his tall frame on her toes, meeting Anna’s smile over his shoulder and throwing her a wink. “So glad you made it here alright. But I insist on you calling me Lucille, you hear me?“
“Of course, of course. I’m so sorry it took me quite a bit of time to get here.”
“Don’t be. You are here with us now, that’s all that matters, son.”
She rubbed his back in appreciation and Harry’s chest ached at the feel of Anna’s mother treating him like one of her own, at her calling him son. A word he hadn’t heard from a mother in what felt like forever.
Anna teared up at the scene, ignoring Luke’s grunt and Kathie’s sniffles, not being able to take her eyes away.
If they didn’t already, she knew her family would adore him after this. They would see the tremendous big heart he had, the genuine care he had for people, the real Harry she was lucky enough to be with and not the prince who appeared on various magazine covers in an unflattering light.
They would see the man she fell hopelessly in love with. And she knew, absolutely knew, they would love him, too. They would accept him like they had accepted Gabe and Kathie with open arms. He would become part of the Caro family.
And she sighed happily at that.
Wild Winter's Day 